Bo Advice
Tonight SB & I have been getting a lot of sweet nervous anon confessions from virgins who want to know how to go about no longer being virgins. Here is my advice.
Find your sexual confidence. You have to do this before you can even dream about having good sex. You know that awesome RuPaul line, “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?” This line holds true for sex. If you can’t make love to yourself, you’re not going to know how to go about making love to someone else. So here’s what you need to do:
1. Masturbate. Get to know your body. Enjoy it. Learn how to give yourself an orgasm. I cannot stress how important it is to know your body. When you have sex you’re going to have to help your partner get you off & if you’ve never gotten yourself off, how is your partner possibly going to know how to please you? Please yourself first, then let someone else join in.
2. Find a person that you’re comfortable with both physically & emotionally. I’m not saying you have to find the love of your life, but it’s important that you have sex with someone you’re comfortable with, someone who you can be naked beside, someone who is impressed by you, enjoys you, someone you can communicate with because that’s what good sex is: communication.
3. Just do it. Seriously. If you want to have sex, go Nike on your ass & just have sex. Don’t wait around for the “perfect person” because that person probably won’t come along for many years. Your first will most likely not be your best & that is totally cool! What’s more important is that your first time be sweet & positive.
4. Have fun! Sex is fun. It’s the way your body rejoices. Don’t build it up to be something scary, because it’s not. If you want to have sex: have sex. If you don’t feel comfortable with yourself yet: don’t have sex. Just as I think you should just go for it, I also believe you shouldn’t put a time-limit on yourself. I lost my virginity when I was 16 & I thought I was super old. I’ve known people who have lost their virginity well into their 20s & that’s cool too. What’s most important is that you do it when you’re prepared & when you want to, don’t let any outside element put pressure on your body’s decision, whether it’s to wait or go for it.
We need more of these posts on Tumblr. Awesome, accurate, and sex-positive. Yes.
